The Joy of Having Male Friends

Last week I read a fabulous book called “The Girls from Riyadh.” It was part Charles Dickens and part “Sex in the City.” It was  Dickensonian in that it was a serialized soap opera. Dickens’ medium was the newspaper. This author sent out a weekly e-mail. The “Sex in the City,” aspect is because it was about the love lives of 4 young women.

What struck me as the real tragedy was not the miserable relationships they had with their husbands and boyfriends, but that they had no male friends.

I get all kinds of sickly sweet crapolo on the web about celebrating the friendships between women. But what about our friendships with guys! Yeah, what about the guys!

Its Friday morning. Here is my week in guys.

Monday: Met with Mastermind group: 3 Guys, Scott Ginsburg, Steve Hughs, Andy Masters and moi. One in his 20’s, one 30’s, one 40’s, and me in my 50’s. Helped me with my book marketing. We shared take- home ideas from the great Chris Clark-Epstein workshop on Sat.

Tuesday, met with Tom Burk, the husband of client  Vicky Burk, who is about to become a client. Tom works at an all boy’s Marianist high school. Thank you Vicky for marrying a man who is also a development professional. So considerate!

Wednesday. Finally met a friend I’ve been working with for over a year! Matt Kush, my SEO guy and I have had a phone friendship while he was builting my website. My other pal David Hults and I brought him to St. Louis from Chicago to give two workshops on SEO optimization. Matt did a kick ass job.

David LOVES clothes. In London I had bought him a tie with matching cuff links to match his blue, blue eyes for helping our daughter-on-law with her career planning.He seemed to like them. Yeah.

During Matt’s presentation, there were some problems with the network in the media room in my new building, and my new guy friend, David Strom leaned over and whispered this sweet nothing in my ear, “Let me know if you want me to come over and fix the wifi.” I mean, how great is that!

And yesterday, I had lunch with one of my all time favorite guy friends, Ed Tasch. We talked about two of my favorite topics, our kids and governance. We usually also hit politics, but I was in a bit of a rush.

Got back to the office and Tom Bakewell helped me edit a report we are presenting next week to the board from hell. I would NEVER go into that mess without Tom at my side. I think Tom is highly amused by this engagement. He does a lot of turnaround work and is frequently the bad guy. I do a ton of keynotes and I am almost never the bad guy. As he keeps saying, “Welcome to my world.” Tom, if this is your world, I’m going to find an alternate universe ASAP, pal.

And today, I get to spend with my best guy friend of all times, by husband Frank. I adore my women friends, and I certainly don’t take them for granted. But I am so damn glad I live in St. Louis and not Riyadh.

One of my friends once asked if Frank ever got jealous of all of my male friends and I said occasionally, but the truth is, he realized long ago that when my “boyfriend” at TWA upgraded me to first class, he upgraded Frank as well, and ultimately, I don’t want to get into their pants, I want to get into their minds!

Carol Weisman, MSW, CSP, friend of guys and greatful for it


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